10 March 2009

A lesson from childhood

In response to my most recent post, a friend did remind me of something, Aesop's fable of The Raven And The Swan

“A raven saw a swan and desired to secure for himself the same beautiful plumage. Supposing that the swan's splendid white color arose from his washing in the water in which he swam, the Raven left the altars in the neighborhood where he picked up his living, and took up residence in the lakes and pools. But cleansing his feathers as often as he would, he could not change their color, while through want of food he perished. Change of habit cannot alter Nature.”

I guess the moral here is that I should rather accept myself as I am and not worry that all do not. That I cannot alter myself to please everyone, for such a task would leave me being forever in a state of chaotic change trying to please everyone, and thus ultimately a worse friend to all. I don't have to like every little thing about myself, and I have to accept that I may not be able to please everyone, even if it does mean that from time to time I must suffer some degree of emotional pain when things don't work out to my liking.

This doesn't seem all that satisfactory; but then life never is completely to our liking. I will go on being true to myself and maybe learn from this most recent lesson to be more conscientious of the emotional needs of my friends to feel "needed". Independence is a marvelous thing, but loneliness isn't all that great, better instead to discipline oneself to accept a more moderate and balanced approach to independence.

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